In The Team’s Words: Coping with Infertility

We asked members of the team for words of encouragement for people going through the various reproductive stages. Here are some of our responses in our own words…

For those coping with infertility

“It might be hard to accept but some family members and friends may not be able to provide the type of emotional support you need, for a variety of reasons. You have the right to choose your support network based on those individuals who can meet your needs - and it’s ok if they’re not the people you had thought you’d turn to.” - Rebecca Orsini

“You are allowed to say no to events that are upsetting for you (e.g., baby showers), even if that event is for your best friend or family member”. - Dr. Samantha Waxman

“It's okay to feel sad and confused. Don't blame yourself.” - Yolanda Testani

“Difficulty conceiving is never a sign that having a baby isn’t ‘meant for’ you.” - Dr. Jill Satin

Infertility affects 1 in 6 people will experience infertility in their lifetime, yet individuals who have difficulty conceiving will often remark about how lonely they feel in their experience. It can be very difficult to watch as friends or family members become pregnant and have babies, and many individuals report feeling guilty that they want to be happy for their loved one, but it is just too painful. The feelings of isolation intensify as they pull back from their relationships. When trying to conceive, it is also common to blame yourself as you try to make sense of why you cannot get pregnant when it seems easy for others. There is a sense that this is so unfair- because it is so unfair. Infertility is a grief experience- whether you have suffered a pregnancy loss or not- each negative pregnancy test can feel like a loss. Your grief is valid. Our therapists are available to process your emotions, help challenge self-judgement, and strengthen relationships. To learn more or to get in touch, please reach out.