New Year, New you? An Honest Look at New Year’s Resolutions
The start of a the new year can hold promise of positive change, but it can also be experienced as a pressure and make us feel like we’re failing in the first week. We asked members of the Well Parents team for their advice around setting New Year’s resolutions.
From Registered Social Worker Michelle Lavergne:
As a school social worker for almost 15 years, and someone who has three kids, September has always felt more like the 'new year' to me than January. Which is kind of my point.
Starting something new or embarking on a new goal doesn't need a specific time of year to prompt you, it can be any marker that makes sense to you. Significant birthday, anniversary or any other milestone that makes sense to you. In fact, in my experience, shifts or changes that come from markers that have more individualized meaning tend to last the longest versus holding to some external timeline like the new year.
Also, contrary to my instagram feed right now which is saying 'start January 5th and go hard and intense!' I recommend going slow. Think about how you might slowly and gently start to integrate the goals or changes into your routine and build momentum from there. Going 'hard and fast' can often just lead to burnout if it's not sustainable. Think starting with one hour or one day and week, and going from there. Remember the tortoise and the hare? Slow and steady wins the race.
From Registered Social Worker Bridgit Ganson:
Can you open yourself to the quiet gift of this season—gray days, dark mornings, and weather that asks us to turn inward? Might there be an invitation here for rest, reflection, and a slow, necessary metamorphosis?
From Registered social worker Catherine Kates:
Rather than resolutions, I’m much more drawn to intentions and (especially when working with new parents but for all of us) what we can take off, rather than what we need to put on. One thing to release. One layer to soften. One pressure that no longer needs to be carried. One responsibility we can delegate. Etc..
For me, this feels particularly aligned with how children (and adults) actually grow: not through adding more expectations, but through creating enough safety, space, and presence for what’s already there to unfold.
Catherine uses this reflection exercise as a gentle way to say goodbye to the old year and welcome the new one. You can draw or write. You can share, or keep things just for you.
Looking back at the year.
One thing I liked about this year: ___________________________________
One fun or silly memory: ___________________________________
One thing I’m proud of myself for: ___________________________________
One hard thing I got through: ___________________________________
These parts are just for the fire. Take your time.
■ LET GO
Something I don’t want to carry into the new year: ___________________________________
■ WELCOME
Something I want more of next year: ___________________________________
■ EXTRA WISH: ___________________________________
■ ONE WORD FOR MY YEAR (optional): ___________________________________
On behalf of our whole team, we wish you a happy and healthy year ahead.