Finding Silver Linings in Challenging Times

By: victoria naik

What a difference a few weeks and a little fresh air can make. I wrote my last post sitting on a hotel room floor, struggling to gather my thoughts during Day 13 of quarantine. Now, with some time, space and sunshine, I’m able to look back on my experience with a little perspective and a lot more humour.

So, what am I ultimately taking away from my extreme quarantine experience? On reflection, there were some silver linings.

Closeness

When I described my quarantine experience as feeling eerily similar to the newborn days, I can now see that it was more than just the ‘I can’t leave the house’ feeling that reminded me of being a new mom. In quarantine, I experienced a closeness with my children that I haven’t felt in years. At times, this closeness felt too intense, but there were other times when I was able to cuddle and embrace my girls in a way that reminded me about the power of simply holding them close. Remember that feeling of having your one-month-old asleep on your chest? You’re trapped and can’t move, but it’s also the best, most peaceful feeling in the world. During extreme quarantine, I had many of those moments.

Sometimes You Need to Talk Yourself Through It

As much as I leaned on my community during quarantine, I spent a lot of time in dialogue with myself. In those early mornings before the girls were awake, or at night as I sat in the dark, I often had to be my own cheerleader. I let go of some of the low points (Fanta, anyone?!) and reminded myself about all of the small ways I was helping my daughters through the experience. My awareness of my own self-talk still feels heightened now that I’m out of quarantine and this sense of being present and intentional is something that I hope continues long after my quarantine experience becomes a distant memory.

Things I’ll Never Take for Granted Again

Sometimes we intentionally embrace a big change and sometimes change hits us like a tidal wave. Even as my extreme quarantine has ended, I continue to experience the ongoing reality shifts that the pandemic has brought to all of our lives. What will this all mean? What am I learning? Will this ever feel like it’s over? How will my life be different on the other side? I have no idea how to answer these questions, but I do know that before COVID-19, I wasn’t always asking these questions in the way I am now. My sense of what is permanent and what can change has fundamentally shifted, and so has my sense of what’s possible and what’s important. As the pandemic continues, I don’t think these insights will be easy to untangle, but I do feel a sense that there are many things I will never take for granted again. Casual coffee dates with friends, sending my kids to school without fear, seeing family without having to stand 2 metres apart; on that magical day when we do begin to get these things back, I will treasure them in a very unique way. 

For those finding it hard to adjust to the 'new normal' or grappling with what the future holds, our Parenting Consultation & Support can assist in navigating these changes with an emphasis on mindful parenting and maintaining optimism.