Parenting Panel: Potty Training
We asked 4 parenting pros in the community some of our burning questions.
Today’s Question:
What are some of your favourite tips related to potty training?
Cori Stern, MA, OCT, BCBA
Cori is a Learning Specialist and Behaviour Therapist, and business owner. She’s also a Mother of a 6 & 4 year old.
“Transitioning out of diapers is a really exciting thing but can be very stressful for parents. Try your best to be as relaxed as you can be about it. If you’re stressed, your child will be stressed, which will make the process that much more difficult. I always tell parents to expect accidents because it’s part of the learning process. Learning to control the urinary and bowel systems is a natural process just like learning to walk- no need for tangible rewards like candy or stickers when your child is successful. Always focus on building internal vs. extrinsic motivation. Positive praise goes a long way.”
Dr. Jill Shuster, Ph.D., C.Psych.
Dr. Shuster is a Clinical and School Psychologist who works with children and adolescents in private practice at The Possibilities Clinic and at the Toronto District School Board. Dr. Shuster is a mother to two young children.
“I’m just about to undertake this challenge with my youngest. Wish me luck!
Here are some tips I will try to remind myself during this process:
• Consistency is key. Even if progress is slow, it will be helpful to remain consistent with my expectations and try not to get too frustrated when my child is struggling.
• Celebrate successes and respond neutrally to accidents.
• Empathize that learning a new skills can be hard but with practice we can be successful.”
Tia Slightham
Tia is a teacher, business owner (Tia Slightham Parenting Solutions), best selling author (You’ve Got This Mama, Too) and “most importantly a mom” to two boys.
“The reason potty training is typically a challenging period for parents is that its’ one area that really forces parents to be the teacher. When parents feel responsible for their child’s success in potty training it adds an extra level of stress and anxiety. This is where the power struggles often present.
One way to help ease potty training stress is to be sure your child is potty training ready before you begin. A few readiness questions to ask yourself about your child are:
1) Does my child ask to have their diaper or pants changed?
2) Is my child curious and interested in the potty?
3) Do they want to watch mom/dad go potty and/or have questions about the potty?
4) Can they sing the ABC’s (seems silly but it shows they understand sequencing which helps with steps to go potty
5) Can they and do they ask for water or snacks if they are hungry (shows they are aware of their body’s feelings)
Check to see if your child is “ready” to begin potty training with the questions above. If they are ready then go for it! Grab your complete Potty Training step-by-step guide here.”
Dr. Jemma Helfman, PsyD, C.Psych.
Dr. Helfman is a mother and clinical psychologist working in private practice at Kidcrew in Toronto, Ontario.
“• Get some pet odour spray and then get comfortable with the likelihood that there will be accidents in your home (and the pet spray will help the clean up)!
• Let your child see you and others living in the home using the toilet.
• Ideally wait until they are ready and take your cues from them.
• If an older child is having difficulties potty training or having lots of accidents, think about what may be getting in the way:
Are they too busy playing?
Is it about control?
Are they anxious about using a toilet at school?
Are there any issues with constipation?
This will help you decide how to intervene.”
Check back here as we ask the experts our burning parenting questions!
For parents looking for more support or personalized guidance, visit our parenting consultation page where our experts can provide tailored advice and strategies to make potty training a positive experience.
